Thursday, April 16, 2009

WATS YOUR STYLE?

Notice the cartoon is by some guy called Dicks? Sometimes our parents look at us and instinctively tell wat kind of men we are gon be! Genius!


So, how was Easter? Financially draining? Spiritually uplifting? Family/friends/enemies forgive and forget appropriate or just a lousy long break? I was missing the moment when I could come write this next installation...April is running..er, cumming apart rather fast!


So, am asking seriousl, wats your style man!!

Honestly? If you can bend it, you would tell right? IS IT ok to talk about it?! LOL!
Guys will tell ya they hit that!! But will never divulge the nasty Bamboo split technique employed! Why?

Is it because it is demeaning enough to "Dick and Tell" plus the indignation of explaining how we twisted her around? Or is it the opposite! It sounds ridiculous to describe our own acrobatics!!! LOL!! Pathetic! Positions are EVERYTHING during sex mazee!


In Africa, the fascination lies with the woman, how she can roll and sashay her hips ontop, beneath you or however! This is especially so south of the Equator. Notice that the dances in the North and West are all about neck, shoulders and head exressions.
Below the Equator, you get more hands and hip action. The North of Mozambique, Malawi, Zambia and Tanzania zone is notorious for the hip swinging Sindimba Dances! So, I am qualified to continue writing, I am tribally from RIGHT in the middle of the zone!


However, universal academic fascination about sex positions has really been from the Indo-Oriental world. There are numerous links I can make references for you to go oogle. Just type in Kama Sutra and billions of web pages will pop up to sell you ancient secrets. There is no ancient! There is NO secret. Do it NOW lest....


Sex can be mundane! Blame it on marriage or your lack of improvisation. I always tell my most devout of friends that seminarian purity has gat to stop at the bedroom door. Think about it:

*The average man only attempts (and gets stuck into) about 4 sexual position variations in his lifetime!
* The Missionary Position will continue to be the most widely used sexual position by men as they age...need explanation?

Clearly, we need to do better than that! Yes, particularily with the desperate wife! We need to come up with 21 positions! 3 for each day of the week!
You and Her need to have pet names for the 3 Monday episodes, 3 Tuesday escapades, 3 Wednesday shags, 3 Thursday flings, 3 Friday Freaky sessions, 3 Saturday Grooves and 3 Sunday snugs! See how I just flow....if you manage even twice a week sex!


Guys, we tend to forget that 'positions" are not to be assumed by the lady alone! Get wat I mean? We are the ones busy bending her over, twisting, pinning, lifting and limb tangling. It is a perverse one sided confrontation! Have we ever thought about how cool she may find it if we are the ones doing the split and roll, the lightning bolt, the reverse bull thrust and bamboo tying!!!


Please join me in this 'pivotal" revolution!

Don't be ashamed to have your legs lifted high in the air , spread wide as she gently descends her posterior between you...now tell me wats the shame in that...!!!

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