Monday, June 29, 2009

CHEATERS.COM


I read this and thought it was hilarious....but it may be my wicked sense of humor?

Cheating 2.0: New Mobile Apps Make Adultery Easier

Two-timing politicians, take note: cheating has never been easier. AshleyMadison.com, a personals site designed to facilitate extramarital affairs, now boasts slick iPhone and Blackberry versions that help married horndogs find like-minded cheaters within minutes. The new tools are aimed at tech-savvy adulterers wary of leaving tracks on work or home computers. Because the apps are loaded up from phones' browsers, they leave no electronic trail that suspicious spouses can trace.

Even as public outrage boils up over the infidelity of South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford and Nevada Senator John Ensign, millions of Americans are sneaking online to do some surreptitious cheating of their own. (Read TIME's report: "Senator John Ensign: 'I Had an Affair.'")

Unlike Craigslist's plain-Jane listings, AshleyMadison lets cheaters customize profiles, chat anonymously and trade messages about adulterous preferences — all in an effort to make cheating as simple as using Match.com.

The formula is working. AshleyMadison's membership has doubled over the past year to 4 million. The Toronto-based site, which takes its name from the two most popular female names in 2001, the year it launched, enjoyed another big boost this week, following Father's Day, when CEO Noel Biderman says men often feel underappreciated. Traffic to the site tripled on Monday. (Biderman says there's a similar boost in interest from neglected wives and girlfriends after Valentine's Day.)

Over the past month alone, 679,000 men and women have used the service to contact a cheating partner. According to their profiles, 92% of males on the site are married or otherwise attached, as are 60% of female members. No word on how many politicians have signed on. (Read TIME's report: "Sanford's Sex Scandal: Assessing the Damage.")

Critics call AshleyMadison a cruel sex site that profits from marital pain. "This is a business built on the back of broken hearts, ruined marriages and damaged families," says Trish McDermott, a dating-industry consultant who helped found Match.com and Engage.com. "It's in the business of rebranding infidelity," she says, "making it not only monetizable, but adding a modicum of normalcy to it. AshleyMadison is making bad choices, broken promises and faithlessness look like something that's trendy and hip and fun to talk about at a cocktail party."

"We're just a platform," responds Biderman. "No website or 30-second ad is going to convince anyone to cheat," he says. "People cheat because their lives aren't working for them." Not everyone buys that line of defense. The Las Vegas Review-Journal recently refused to run an AshleyMadison ad referencing the Ensign scandal. But other racy TV, billboard and radio ads have succeeded in raising the site's profile over the past year to the point where by some measures it's in the top tier of dating sites, with tens of millions of dollars in annual profits. AshleyMadison charges members $49 for a package of credits they can use to contact up to 20 members. Members don't pay to receive messages, just to initiate contact, so many women end up using the site for free.

Maybe that's why many of the site's new members are female. Biderman says the proportion of women on the site has grown from 15% — when the service quietly launched in 2001 — to nearly 30% today.

Dorothy, a 45-year-old Floridian whose screen name begins with SexyMom, says she's been married for 20 years but started using the site four months ago because her husband constantly turned down sex and refused marriage counseling. "It's like the seven-year itch, but 20 years later," she says. "My husband never throws me a compliment. Now I meet guys who say, 'You're so hot,' or 'You have great eyes.'"

On a recent weekday, 38 men sent messages to Dorothy, who checks these e-mails on her phone during breaks at work. "If I wanted to schedule something for morning, noon and night, I could," she says. She ignores most inquiries, especially those from immature 20-somethings or older men seeking a one-night stand. "I'm looking for a friend, possibly with benefits," she says, "but I'm not out there to shake someone's hand and open my legs."

So far Dorothy has met seven men through the site, she says, including a wealthy, 49-year-old divorced doctor with whom she hit it off. Dorothy says her husband would be livid if he found out, but he doesn't know how to use a computer. "Now I don't have to bug him for intimacy," she says.

AshleyMadison isn't the only site aimed at under-the-radar relationships. Sites like EstablishedMen.com and SeekingArrangement.com all offer variations on the theme. But AshleyMadison is the most successful site openly capitalizing on extramarital affairs.

And for that, Biderman offers no apologies. "Humans aren't meant to be monogamous," he says. So would this free-thinking CEO mind if his own wife used his site? "I would be devastated," he says.

  • Find this article at:
  • http://www.time.com/time/business/article/0,8599,1907542,00.html
  • Thursday, June 25, 2009

    MIND GAMES

    LAID CHICKS

    WORDS AND MEANINGS

    EYE CONTACT - A method utilized by one person to indicate that they are interested in another. Despite being advised to do so, many men have difficulty looking a woman directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located in her chest.

    FRIEND - A person in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.

    INDIFFERENCE - A woman's feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the man to be "playing hard to get".

    INTERESTING - A word a man uses to describe a woman who lets him do all the talking.

    IRRITATING HABIT - What the endearing little qualities that initially attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together.

    LAW OF RELATIVITY - How attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is.

    DANGEROUS CONFESSIONS

    Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia.
    One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in.

    "I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding to your profession." The sheik turns to the first man and asks him what he does for a living.
    "I'm a cop", says the first man.
    "Then we will shoot your p*#s off!", said the sheik.
    He then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living.
    "I'm a firemen", said the second man.
    "Then we will burn your penis off!", said the sheik.
    Finally, he asked the last man, "And you, what do you do for a living?"
    And the third man answered, with a sly grin,
    "I'm a lollipop salesman!"

    FIN-NISH

    The Indian Lover, a virile middle aged Indian gentlemen named Guluh was relaxing at his favorite bar in Mumbai when he managed to attract a spectacular young blond woman. Things progressed to the point where he led her back to his apartment and, after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom where he rattled her senseless. After a pleasant interlude, he asked with a smile, "So, you finish?"
    She paused for a second, frowned, and replied, "No."
    Surprised, Guluh reached for her and the rattling resumed. This time she thrashed about wildly and there were screams of passion. The sex finally ended and, again, Guluh smiled and asked, "You finish?"
    Again, after a short pause, she returned his smile, cuddled closer to him and softly said, "No."
    Stunned, but damned if he was going to leave this woman unsatisfied, Guluh reached for the woman yet again. Using the last of his strength, he barely managed it, but they ended together screaming, bucking, clawing and ripping the bed sheets.
    Exhausted, Guluh fell onto his back, gasping. Barely able to turn his head, he looked into her eyes, smiled proudly and asked again, "You finish?"
    Barely able to speak, the beautiful blond whispered in his ear,
    "No, I Norwegian"

    BOOM SHACK AT ALLIANCE..!



    The 41 Boom Shack :
    With DJ NIKI :
    Hip hop music + Live performances :
    >> Fid Q
    >> Sefu
    >> Junior
    >> Madog Family
    >> Masharikanz
    >> Graffiti by WTC
    >> Breakdance, Spoken Words...

    Saturday 27 June
    From 9pm till late, at Alliance Upstairs
    Entrance: 5000 Tsh

    In Partnership with 41 Records.

    KARIBUNI !

    ***********
    Contact :

    Coordinator of cultural activities
    Ali Hassan Mwinyi Road (behind Las Vegas Casino)
    Tel : +255 (22) 2131 406
    Mobile AF: 0755 481 374
    E-mail : cultural@afdar.com

    SELLING BIBLES

    A pastor concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new Bibles that had never been opened and distributed. So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the
    congregation who would be willing to sell the Bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately needed money for the church.
    Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.
    The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as salesmen and were likely capable of selling some bibles. But he had serious doubts about Louie who was a local farmer, who had always
    kept to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment. Poor Louis stuttered badly. But, not wanting to discourage Louie, the minister decided to let him try anyway. He sent the three of them away with the back seat of their cars stacked with Bibles. He asked them to meet with him and report the results of their door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.
    Anxious to find out how successful they were, the minister immediately asked Jack, 'Well, Jack, how did you make out selling our bibles last week?'
    Proudly handing the reverend an envelope, Jack replied,
    "Using my sales prowess, I was able to sell 20 bibles, and here's the $200 I collected on behalf of the church.'
    'Fine job, Jack!' The minister said, vigorously shaking his hand. 'You are indeed a fine salesman and the Church is indebted to you.'
    Turning to Paul, 'And Paul, how many bibles did you sell for the Church last week?'
    Paul said, "I am a professional salesman. I sold 28 bibles on behalf of the church, and here's $280 I collected.'
    The minister responded, 'That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You are truly a professional salesman and the church is indebted to you.'
    Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie and said,
    'And Louie, did you manage to sell any Bibles last week?'
    Louie silently offered the minister a large envelope.
    The minister opened it and counted the contents. 'What is this?' the minister exclaimed. 'Louie, there's $3200 in here! Are you suggesting that you sold 320 bibles for the church, door to door, in just one week?'
    Louie just nodded.
    'That's impossible!" Both Jack and Paul said in unison. 'We are professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many Bibles as we could.'
    'Yes, this does seem unlikely,' the minister agreed. 'I think you'd better explain how you managed to accomplish this, Louie.'
    Louie shrugged. 'I-I-I re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know f-f-f-for sh-sh-sh-sure,' he stammered.
    Impatiently, Peter interrupted. 'For crying out loud, Louie, just tell us what you said to them when they answered the door!'
    'A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was,' Louis replied, 'W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this b-b-b-b-bible F-f-for t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks ---o-o-o-or- -- wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just l-like m-m-me t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-he re and r-r-r-r-r-read it t-to y-y-you??'

    "COCK-ED THINGS..."

    An airplane full of a shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa had a malfunction, and went down.
    A few weeks later, the Pepsi Company sent a rescue plane. They searched the area and found a tribe of cannibals. They walked up to the Chief of the tribe and asked him if he knew anything about the crash.
    The Chief said, "Yeah."
    When asked where the crew was, the Chief replied, "We ate the crew, and we drank the Pepsi"
    The Rescue crew were shocked. One man asked, "Did you eat their legs?"
    The chief replied, "We ate their legs, and we drank the Pepsi"
    Another rescuer asked, "Did you eat their arms?"
    The Chief said, "We ate their arms, and we drank the Pepsi."
    After looking totally perplexed for a minute, a third asked, "Did you, you know,eat their 'things'?"
    The chief says,"No."
    "No?" asked the rescuer.
    "No," replied the Chief, ... "Things go better with Coke."

    IMMIGRANT STYLE

    An illegal immigrant picks up a hooker. 'Hey, how much you charge for da hour, sister?' he asks.
    '$100,' she replies.
    In broken English he says 'Do you do Immigrant Style?'
    'No' she says.
    'I pay you $200 to do Immigrant Style.'
    'No', she says, not knowing what Immigrant Style is.
    'I pay you $300.'
    'No', she says.
    'I pay you $400.'
    'No', she says.
    So finally he says, 'OK, I pay $1,000 to do Immigrant Style.'
    She thinks, 'Well, I've been in the game for over 10 years now. I've had every kind of request from weirdoes from every part of the world. How bad could Immigrant Style be?'.
    So she agrees and has sex with him.
    They do it in every kind of way and in every possible position. Finally, after several hours, they finish.
    Exhausted, the hooker turns to him and says, 'Hey, I was expecting something perverted and disgusting. But that was good. So what exactly is 'Immigrant Style'?'
    The illegal immigrant replies 'Now, you send bill to Government.'

    LOST.COM

    LEADING BY EXAMPLE

    YOU TWIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?


    I was prompted to sign up to Twitter. So I tried it out. It is kind of cool.
    There is a tangy perversion in waiting to know what the people you are following are "up to next". You kind of wonder are they making their lives interesting on purpose? Should I?

    Then there is the issue of anonymity. Plus personal openess. Who the hell is that wanting to follow you? Why? Is that their real picture? Is this a new dating, hook up gateway?
    Can I for example exploit Twitter to invite peeps to the down low a la Berlusconi like party I have set up some obscure weekend soon?

    Can I hook up with Argentinian Mamacitas too!? Or whatever they call 'em down there?
    LOL!

    END OF WEEK TEST


    THE BANANA TEST
    There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are 4 animals,
    a Lion, a Chimpanzee, a Giraffe, and a Squirrel, who pass by.

    They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the tree.
    Who do you guess will win?
    Your answer will reflect your personality.
    So think carefully . . . Try and answer within 30 seconds.
    Got your answer?

    Now scroll down to see the analysis.
    If your answer is:

    Giraffe = you're unrealistic.
    Lion = you're not honest.
    Chimpanzee = you're a complete moron.
    Squirrel = you're hopeless.







    A COCONUT TREE DOESN'T HAVE BANANAS.
    Weekend is near, Obviously you're stressed and overworked.You should take some time off and relax!

    Monday, June 22, 2009

    OBSESSION

    Guys, the ones wearing wedding rings.
    Here is a refreshing topic for you. But before I begin, please go out and borrow or buy "Obsessed". Beyonce stars in it.
    I know, it is one of those tell it as it is films, not appropriate to watch with the wife! It raises some sticky-icky issues. Especially if she has a habit of pausing the DVD and turns to you saying..."That is just like you...."
    It is pitiful...
    You have got it made! You are the envy of all men! You are the husband of a beautiful, intellegent (not just smart) and ambitious wife, slogging hours alone at home looking after your lovable son, the pride of any man!
    The kind of scenario that should put every man to heel! No matter how the dogs in the office push you to get back to roaming the proverbial alleys if infidelity.
    It is perfect....
    All's fair when love is War! I love the tagline!
    Now, I watched the film about a quarter way, just after the Christmass Party mens room scene! I couldn't get the wife off it! She was entranced! On her face, taut concentration. Tanesco needs to cut power at times like that!
    Anyway, I paused it, she sighed and agreed to go set the dinner table. It was getting too intense. I was relieved that we took a pause from the movie. She likes soccer. Brazil (team she admires) was about to rock Italys Goal-ndolas on television! We watched that and she got sleepy...
    I have a feeling if I am late home, she will unpause and get to the bottom of the obsession without me! LOL!

    Guys, go watch the movie. I am leaving the blog space open to your opinions on the subject matter. What do we think? Flirting can be deadly these days.
    Some women just don't get it:

    • The smart quips and broad smiles mean I am humorous!Period.
    • Yes, I am wearing this ring, fer real! My name is Taji, sure, I also have Jack crotched away but I ain't a player no more!!
    • Why am I buying? I gat extra cash. No, not to give away and I ain't paying for quickies!
    • Innocent fun? More like innocent traps! You spread them, I get held up for life!
    • Every other man does it? Really? Is this a generalization? Wait, I need an official audit report, you prove it, I %&*@ you!
    Who is the one getting obsessed anyway? I gotta finish watching that film! You hit this link to get a taste of lust....

    Derek Charles isa hard working man, employed as a asset manager in a private company. He is very happy with his beautiful wife, Sharon, and only son, and because of his hard work he just got a huge promotion. But suddenly he gets a temporary worker who is both attractive and smart, and Derek is understandably impressed with her and also finds himself physically drawn to her. However, this new girl is desperate to get close to him - at any cost.

    OUR VERY OWN IDA! - LATE IN THE MONTH EYECANDY


    Beautiful!!

    Thursday, June 18, 2009

    The Obedient Wife

    There was a man, who had worked all his life, had saved all of his money, & was a real
    miser when it came to his money.

    Just before he died, he said to his wife,"When I die, I want you to take all my money and
    put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me."

    And so he got his wife to promise him, with all of her heart, that when he died, she would put all of the money into the casket with him.

    Well, he died.

    He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there - dressed in black, and her friend was sitting next to her.. When they finished the ceremony, and just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, "Wait just a moment!"

    She had a small metal box with her; she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then
    the undertakers locked the casket down and they rolled it away.

    So her friend said, "Girl, I know you were not foolish enough to put all that money in there with your late husband."
    The loyal wife replied, "Listen, I'm a Christian; I cannot go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money into the casket with him."

    "You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!?!?!?"

    "I sure did," said the wife. "I got it all together, put it into my account, and wrote him a Cheque.... If he can cash it, then he can spend it."

    "God made man, man made money, money made man mad..." how does it get to the part where woman got smarter?

    APPLOCATION...

    I am apply to my job of security guard to you boss in you company of Shoprite.





    I complete to Grade 8 examination certificate in 1997. I am 27 ears to be Born of age and no mallied and no childish.



    My father is dead long time ago and my mother mary in Zaire country there 10 years now, no see she so nobody known to help me.



    My certificate is just sitting home for itself, but passes in Mathematiks, Geography, Sayanse and all subjects but fail in English because of Nyanja teacher, Mr Phiri, teaching me is jelos of myself. Me wear expenses cloth than Ngoni teacher.



    I here people you want security guards to you company and I tell you I Am one of that job experience for 2 years. I shot thief dead. I want to Join the company of you and chase criminal out with me AK47.



    Please consider my aplication careful and call me any time because me Have celphone. I am red for interview with you. I am very hornest and can speak English free.



    Please also greet your wife. And rememba that English is not our mother land!!



    Yours in faith,





    Pasopa Mampara




    My picture frame I look beautiful Pasopa Mampara

    Monday, June 15, 2009

    GETTING PAID...MAN!!!!

    I was a teen. I was totally captivated by Harrison Ford as Indiana Jones! His intense look, his wry smile, his whip for lack of biceps, the humour in the face of great danger! The escapades, villains, special effects, plausible storylines simply captured me!
    No other actor has yet come close beating him out in the high stakes drama adventure flicks. Am so glad he got paid, but man! How old do you have to get to finally earn like that! Phew! Am envious! Read on!

    For the past five years, it seemed that Harrison Ford was happier out of the spotlight than on the silver screen. Since 2000, Ford has appeared in only four movies, none of which made much of an impression at the box office.

    That all changed in 2008 when Ford strapped back on his trusty whip and went adventuring again in "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull," the fourth film in the Indiana Jones series. In order to lure Ford out of his semi-retirement, Paramount agreed to a lucrative deal that split almost all of the film's earnings (after the studio made back its production and advertising costs) between Ford, Steven Spielberg and George Lucas.

    As a result of the deal, Ford earned $65 million between June 2008 and June 2009, making him the highest-paid actor on our annual Celebrity 100 list. (Even though the movie was released in May of 2008, Ford didn't earn his money until several months later.)

    Source:Yahoo Movies/Forbes

    Friday, June 12, 2009

    NO COMMENT...


    You know the stats. How much money has been splashed out. The comparisons, Messi, Kaka, Et'o having scored just over him last season. There are disputes and the indisputable points. He is a diver, he is cocky, good looking, rich...he's got great talent, versatility.
    Practical skills like the 30+ yard over the defenders and into goal dipping free kicks, the left leg right leg prowess, the whiplash kick, the cross over and heel flicks, the maurading runs down the flanks, fearless possession and defense attack.
    Aggressive, a winner, young fabulous! Yes, we would all like to be able to pop champagne like him, get a triple digit lap dance and Ferrari it back to the glitzy hotel for......

    So, let's see how his dream move fits in.
    Did I say no comment?
    Michel Platini certainly had a lot more to say! How d Man U fans feel?

    OUR BRAINS? THE FEMALE...


    www.FunAndFunOnly.net

    THE MALE BRAIN

    www.FunAndFunOnly.net

    Wednesday, June 10, 2009

    MODERN WIVES


    These are the type of women we should be marrying....Mordern women- so says the men?!

    It is a myth that when a son gets married and a new daughter-in-law arrives in the family, everything changes.

    Some daughters-in-law are well trained and well mannered.....They don't come to change the family, they are here to... (READ ON!)


    The new wife was being welcomed at the husband's home in a traditional manner. As expected she gave a speech;

    'My dear family, I thank you for welcoming me in my new home and family, firstly, my being here does not mean that I would want to change your way of life, your routine .'No, I will never do that, never in a million years.'


    'What do you mean my child?' asked the father-in-law.

    'What I mean dad is (looking at her in-laws);


    Those who used to wash the dishes must carry on washing them.

    Those who used to do the laundry must carry on doing it.

    Those who cooked should not stop at my account, AND

    Those who used to clean should continue cleaning!!!


    'And what are you here for?' enquired the mother-in-law.


    'AS FOR ME, I'M HERE JUST TO ENTERTAIN YOUR SON!!!!!'


    Tuesday, June 9, 2009

    PRESS RELEASE




    PRESS RELEASE

    ALLIANCE FRANCAISE and THE FRENCH EMBASSY are proudly supporting Mrisho Mpoto’s
    participation to the Third Slam Poetry World Cup in June in Paris, France.

    In September 2008, Mrisho Mpoto, an increasingly popular Tanzanian poet, singer and comedian
    won the 2008 Indian Ocean Slam Poetry Competition organized in the Réunion Island by the
    Slamlakour network, with the support of the Conseil Général (Regional Parliament). His trip
    was facilitated by the French Embassy in Tanzania and the Alliance Française Dar es Salaam.

    In June 2009, Mrisho will be in Paris to participate in the 2009 World Slam Poetry
    Competition to represent Tanzania. His trip will be also facilitated by the French Embassy
    in Tanzania and the Alliance Française Dar es Salaam.
    Late 2008, Mrisho approached the Alliance Française Dar es Salaam and proposed to organize a
    Slam Poetry Competition in Dar es Salaam. The idea was most welcome and Alliance assisted
    Mrisho and his partners to design the project document.

    The Third Slam Poetry World Cup will take place in France, at Bobigny, a town part of the
    greater Paris, from 16th to 21st June 2009. The competition rules are strict: each poem
    presentation is done within less than 3 minutes and in the poet’s original language.
    Therefore, Mrisho will say his poems in Kiswahili. Each poet will present six different
    poems and the Competitions can be between two poets or more and between two teams or more.

    This year’s World Cup will have 16 poets from 16 different countries, including 3 African
    countries, to compete: Austria, Canada, Denmark, Finland, France, Germany, Holland,
    Madagascar, Quebec, Spain, Swaziland, Sweden, Tanzania, UK, USA and Zimbabwe.

    The main sponsors include the French Ministry of Education, the French Ministry of Culture,
    the City of Paris, the City of Bobigny and MTV Base.


    More info:
    ALLIANCE FRANÇAISE
    Your French Language and Cultural Centre in Dar es Salaam
    French courses, Resource centre, Films, Exhibitions, Concerts.
    21 31 406 / 0755 481 374
    cultural@afdar.com / www.ambafrance-tz.org <http://www.ambafrance-tz.org/>
    Ali Hassan Mwinyi Road (car park behind Las Vegas Casino)
    Office opening hours: Mon-Fri: 9am-1pm / 2pm-6pm / Sat: 10am-5.30pm

    PRESS RELEASE

    Vodacom marketing sponsorships manager Emilian Rwejuna speaking to the press.

    CONTACT PERSON: MUSTAFA HASSANALI

    EMAIL ADDRESS: media@mustafahassanali.net

    WEBSITE URL: http://www.mustafahassanali .net/

    Mustafa Hassanali to Showcase at “ARISE AFRICA FASHION WEEK”

    Launch of Mustafa Hassanali Ready to Wear Collection Named “MDUARA”

    Tanzania Media to Cover Mustafa Hassanali Showcase

    Mustafa Hassanali, Tanzania ’s renowned Fashion Designer has been invited to the inaugural Arise Africa Fashion Week by Africa Fashion International to be held from June 12- 19, 2009 at the Sandton Convention Centre in Johannesburg , South Africa .

    Arise Africa Fashion week shall feature 52 designers from 21 African Countries over a period of 8 Days. Mustafa Hassanali is among the invited designers from Tanzania . This shall be his Seventh Showing in The Republic of South Africa.

    (M’Net Face of Africa Finals November 2008 Sun City, Tanzanite One Jewellery Showing in Cape Town during Mining Indaba 2007, Durban Fashion week 2006, Cape Town Fashion week 2005 & 2006 and Vukani Fashion Fair and awards in Pretoria 2004).

    Mustafa Hassanali Says “This is a perfect Platform not only for networking but to look at diverse Market opportunities hence the diversification into the Ready to wear market segment”

    Mustafa Hassanali shall launch his Prêt a Porter Spring/Summer 2009/10 Collection “Mduara”.

    The collection has been inspired by the sacred, savoury, significance, Sensual, soulful, synergetic Rhythms of our Swahili nation

    Mustafa adds “The Vibrancy of our Music, Culture, myths and Beliefs form an integral part of our being hence “Mduara”. The Local Dance Rhythms has inspired this ready to wear Women Collection which is an eclectic mix of Tradition meeting Modernity and vice versa”

    Mustafa Hassanali’s commitment is to not only to promote the creative sector Industry especially Fashion in Tanzania , but also emphasise the Made in Tanzania Concept. He will be accompanied by A Media Contingment that Shall Not only Cover his Showcase on 14 June but also report on the behind the Scenes of the Arise Africa Fashion Week.

    The tour of the Media Contingment has been sponsored by Vodacom (www.Vodacom.co.tz), Tanzania Broadcasting Corporation (www.tbcorp.org) and 1time Airlines (www.1time.co.za).

    Monday, June 8, 2009

    2nd WEEK OF MAY- THE BUTT PANEL

    SWIMWEAR EYECANDY- DAMARIS LEWIS




    SI. sure know their thang!

    HOW FREAKY LET THE WIFEY BE?

    One of the most shocking Hip Hop Album covers was Ice T's Gangsta Rap! It had him and his wife splayed out on a grand bed, black satin sheets, candle lit with a gun on the side; her ontop of him naked! Am not even gon post it here!
    Well that wife continues to stir the hot coals in various mens magazines/sites!
    Her name is Coco. I am tempted to add "licious" to the front of her name coz yes, she has become ridiculously boodilicious over the years! Manufactured parts?!

    Anyway, plastic or not, she is his toy and we get to play along! My issue here is just how far he allows her to go being so "open"! What if it was you? Would you limit the undressing to sectors in the crib or would public demos be appropriate?

    Above, the worlds sexiest updraft pose!
    Heck, I know if am at a party and my wifes gown split starts to creep up like River Zambezi, I would be very quick to bark decent "Mama taughtya!" sitting manners!
    Men are possessive creatures.
    This trait may be considered to be jealousy, but there is a fine line! (A jealous guy kills!).
    It means I bought that dress, those bling blingers on your arms and neck, that ride, those shoes and yes, that hair-do, that was me! Even the glow of your skin baby! I am your cosmetician!
    It also means this party, these V-VIPs you are meeting, it is coz of me!
    It also means, you are who you are, meaning a somebody coz you are with me!

    However, Ice T seems to have reverse-posessessive traits where he does all the above and still allows (?) his wife to get real close to sharing what he should be guarding most!
    I don know, I feel I would be loosing something inherently manly about myself if other guys could peep and see my ass-ets in living colour!

    Thursday, June 4, 2009

    BEER VERSUS KUKU

    BEER VS. KUKU . . .

    1. Beer is always wet. KUKU needs a little work.

    - One point to BEER

    2. Warm beer tastes awful.

    - One point to KUKU

    3. A really cold beer is satisfying.

    - One point to BEER

    4. If after taking a swig of your favorite beer you find a hair between Your teeth, you may vomit.

    - One point to KUKU

    5. Ten beers in one night and you cannot drive home. Ten KUKUS in one, Night and you do not want to drive anywhere.

    - One point to KUKU

    6. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may

    Suffer.

    If you eat any KUKU in public, you become a legend.

    - One point to KUKU

    7. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of KUKU he may buy you a beer.

    - One point to KUKU

    8. You normally do not find old beer.

    - One point to BEER

    9. Too much beer and you will think you see flying saucers.

    Too much KUKU and you will think you have seen God.

    One point to KUKU

    10. In most countries there is a tax on beer.

    - One point to KUKU

    11. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off

    - One point to BEER

    12. You can always be sure if you are the first one to open a bottle or Can.

    - One point to BEER

    13. If you shake up a beer it will get all agitated but it eventually

    Settles down.

    - One point to BEER

    14. You always know how much beer is going to cost

    - One point to BEER

    15. Beer does not have a mother

    - One point to BEER

    16. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it

    -One point to BEER

    FINAL SCORE:

    BEER : 9

    KUKU : 7

    That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER

    PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them. - An extra point for BEER!!

    LOL!! Good One!

    Child's Prayer



    Dear God, this year please send clothes for all those poor ladies in Daddy's Computer...."

    WOMEN OVER 30 REALITY...!

    THIS HAS BEEN WRITTEN BY A MAN..
    This is for all you girls 30 years and over.... and for those who are turning 30, and for those who are scared of moving into their 30's...AND for guys who are scared of girls over 30!!!!...

    This was written by AndyRooney from CBS 60 Minutes. Andy Rooney says:

    As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:
    A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask,"What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

    If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting.

    A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is,what she is, what she wants and from whom.

    Few women past the age of 30 don’t give a damn about what you might think about her or what she's doing.

    Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

    Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

    A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her bestfriend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over 30couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.

    Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 30. They Always Know.

    A woman over 30 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 30 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

    Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a Jerk or if you are acting like one! You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

    Yes, we praise women over 30 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately,it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 30+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.

    Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". Here's an update for you. Nowadays, 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire Pig, just to get a little sausage!

    CAN I HEAR AN AMEN LADIES………..

    Wednesday, June 3, 2009

    CHILD-BIRTH

    Should children witness childbirth?

    Due to a power cut, only one paramedic responded to the call.

    The house was very dark so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-yr old girl to hold a torch high over her mummy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby.

    Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked.

    Heidi pushed and pushed and after a little while, Connor was born.

    The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on hisbottom. Connor began to cry.
    The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the wide-eyed3-yr old what she thought about what she had just witnessed....Kathleen quickly responded;

    "He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place.... Smack him again!"

    Tuesday, June 2, 2009

    TRUTH FROM MY DOCTOR ABOUT DIETING AND POTENTIALLY DEADLY ENGLISH....


    Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

    A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

    Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables? A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

    Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

    A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

    Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

    A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

    Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

    A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
    Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

    A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! ..... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil.. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

    Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

    A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
    Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

    A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans ! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

    Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

    A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

    Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

    A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!

    Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: 'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

    AND.....For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

    1. The Japanese eat very little fatand suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

    2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fatand suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

    3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
    4. The Italians drink a lot of red wineand suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

    5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

    CONCLUSION

    Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.